A change of heart

My cousin Greg and I were born three weeks apart in 1964. As kids, we spent a lot of time together in our small town of Williamstown. Greg is the son of my mother’s older brother Joe. Our grandparents lived in a little house on Henderson Avenue with a big grate in the center of the house that the heat rose up through in the winter time. My grandpa (Pap) called us Buck and Roy after Buck Owens and Roy Clark on the variety show Hee Haw. Of course I was Roy, because I was a chubby kid and Greg was always thin as a rail.

In grade school, we played basketball together. In high school, Greg was the student body president and we were both on student council. We both went to Boys State. I played football and basketball. Greg ran cross country and we both ran track. I was a sprinter/hurdler and Greg was a very talented distance runner. After high school, we both attended Bowling Green State University and roomed together our freshman year.

Boys State dinner 1981.

As things often go, we began to drift our sophomore year. We joined different fraternities, had new friends, and saw each other less often. After college, Greg moved to Columbus and I stayed in Williamstown. We both lived our lives the best we could. We would see each other occasionally at family functions, but we rarely sought out each other’s company.

The next thing you know, 20+ years have gone by. And pain begins to reconnect us. Going through a divorce. The passing of my dad and then my mom. The passing of Greg’s dad. The death of our uncle Tom. These events bring us together and begin to remind us of the family bond that we share.

And then…Myocardial Myopathy. For some time Greg had been feeling drained, with no energy. A genetic disorder had been attacking his heart and he had been powering through it for years. Powering through it to raise three amazing kids. Powering through it to be a very successful businessman and entrepreneur. But he couldn’t power through it anymore.

When he called and told me, he recommended that I go get tested. When it turned out that I did not have the gene, I was relieved, but also felt a sense of guilt. I was taken aback by how Greg’s news affected me. It kept me up at night. It brought me to tears in quiet times alone.

We spent a weekend with Greg and his wife Brenda (who I must say, is one of my favorite all-time people) at their cabin when things were really tough. Greg’s heart was giving out and he was on the list for a heart transplant. He struggled to walk very far, but his spirits were good. We sat on a bench in town and talked while the girls shopped. I was blown away by his calmness and inner peace. His strength and perspective were inspiring and made me remember what is truly important in life. Greg is one of the things that is truly important in my life. I think we both realized how precious our relationship is sitting on that bench.

It’s strange how we get busy with life and we forget what is important in life. Sometimes, only when we encounter death or look death in the eye, do we remember what life is really about.

I will never forget being at Eva’s wedding (Greg’s daughter) and watching them have the Dad/Daughter dance and not being able to hold back tears. At the time, his prognosis was very unclear and we all knew he was struggling.

On July 15, 2021, Greg got a new heart. His recovery has been amazing and he is feeling better every day. He continues to beat the odds as always. In typical Greg style, he is the executive director and board president of the Dilated Cardiomyopathy (DCM) Foundation. The foundation provides hope and support to patients and families with Dilated Cardiomyopathy through research, advocacy, and education. His business savvy and tireless dedication will help so many others who are going through difficult times.

Greg has been given the greatest gift of all, the gift of time. Time with his wife, his children, his grandchildren, his friends, and with his cousin. Time that will not be taken for granted but enjoyed and cherished.

I am so grateful to still have Greg in my life. He continues to inspire me. Our relationship is important to me. I love you Cuz!